US and UK leaders were quick to quash any backfire citing strong evidence linking guitar playing to Marijuana use, Barack Obama stated that this was a “huge stride in the war on drugs” and that he would continue to do “everything in my power to eradicate this scourge on humanity”
UK Prime minister David Cameron went on to outline plans for the future “If my American cousins will forgive me I don’t see this as a huge stride at all, this is a small step down a long path, my concerns deepen with every young citizen forced into Ecstasy use by listening to Techno or Hard house, or worse Crack Cocaine and Heroin by listening to that twat Pete Doherty, who I’m led to believe is now sidestepping the ban by forming experimental percussion group Bongo-shambles”
The ban has forced many current popular metal bands traditionally fronted by Guitars to re-brand, even coercing previously retired acts back into the music industry, lead singer Phil Anselmo of newly re-imagined Pan-Pipe-Tera had nothing but praise for the changes.
“In my younger days I would have perhaps been against this but now I see the wisdom in such a move, creativity needs to be quashed on all fronts in order to generate a workforce capable of sustaining an ever ageing population, and if that means crushing the souls of the young into the floor to suit our needs then I’m all for it, and let’s face it, that’s pretty damn rock. I just hope my melodic pan pipe drones suit a sweat shop or perhaps end up used in some kind of call centre, as long as it doesn’t sound like Enya though, have you heard them? They’re absolutely shit”
The war on music and creativity continues.
@MilkmanHero
